Hey guys! Let’s stay old longer together!
Yes, by eating broccoli.
Yeah! Marie has the idea!
Well of course I do. Good Mythical Morning to all you Mythical Beasts, I really hope you got that reference. Anyway! Today Jo and I are going to be talking about health.
Yes! Because when you’re in good health, you stay old longer!
Which isn’t a good thing. I mean, why would you want to be old longer than usual? Except it is a good thing . . . at least I think it is. It technically means that you live longer . . . and that’s good I guess.
Old would be around 60, so I mean, I hope most of you want to live past 60. Make it a goal! Maybe you could break the world record for oldest person! Maybe you could be 120! Maybe . . . maybe . . .
But being old is like . . . I don’t know. There’s so much you wouldn’t be able to do anymore. But anyway. Health stuff. Can I just say, before we start, that I’m not that healthy?
Unless you’re healthy. And don’t suffer a serious injury. You could be like that one 70 year old dude who ran a marathon. In a short amount of time. Anyway. I’m not either! Surprise! Both of us aren’t in all that great of shape!
Though Jo is in better shape than I am. Even if I do ballet. Which I do. Ballet is . . . well, we could talk about that another day.
Oh I was just going to say you were in better shape because of ballet. But I guess I could be. It’s only been two weeks. And I’ve been working on it. Watching EVERYTHING I EAT. LIKE PREY. Just kidding, not like that. And I’ve been doing my best to work out and I’ve lost five pounds. So. That’s great. But that’s . . . five pounds. And . . . I’m still not completely in shape though I’d like to be so that . . . I CAN BE OLD LONGER!
Well, everything we do in gym should be proof enough that you’re in better shape than I am. Even if I can do more push ups. Which is something I have no clue how it happened. Considering my wimpy ballerina arms. And my non-existent upper body strength. But anyway. Five pounds is good. As a starting place. Just don’t be like that one lady who lost her period because she lost too much weight and was working out too much and yeah.
*Face palm* Well, I mean, that doesn’t mean I’m in better shape than you. That just means that I try harder. Because a) it’s a good workout b) Marsh is trying to help us and I’d like to work as hard as I can and c) I need a good grade in that class or else . . . PROBLEMS. Because you always say that you can’t run for that long, but I think you just need to try a bit harder. I mean, I almost puke a little running that long, but I haven’t yet, have I? NOPE. And I hope I don’t . . . anyway. Yeah. Five pounds is really good. In two weeks. I hope to lose like, what, 4 times that by the end of summer? Yeah I should be going at a good rate to not be like that lady that was crazy and was like, “I HAVE TO LOSE 40 POUNDS IN TWO MONTHS.” Yeah don’t do that peoples. THAT’S DANGEROUS. And don’t starve yourselves because THAT’S WORSE. YOU’RE BODY WILL REACT HORRIBLY. REALLY HORRIBLY IF YOU DO THAT TOO FAST. SO. STOP IT. Or don’t do it.
I do to try. Which form of to/too would you use for that? Probably to. Anyway. Yes. Don’t be like me and be super picky and then go to bed late and therefore wake up late and have no time for breakfast and then not eating at lunch (most of the time) because you’re picky and a vegetarian. Not that I starve myself. I do eat . . . more often than not obviously. So yeah.
Do you try “I’m going to barf up my lunch” try or “I’m pretty sure this is my best” try. Because both are good. I mean, you are getting good grades. I’m just shooting for hardest try. Yeah peoples! You have to develop my problem that I like to call . . . DUN DUN DUN, snacking. Why do you think I was a perfectly healthy little first grader and now a perfectly chubby eighth grader? I BLAME SNACKING. *Shrugs* my family really likes snacks, okay? So. Yeah. AND GO TO BED EARLY. IT’S BETTER FOR YOU.
I have to develop that problem known as snacking or our lovely fictional readers do?
Any one of you who are too scrawny. Just kidding that’s not how works. THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS. I was just kidding. Don’t snack. That’s really bad for you. It gets to the point when you sit there like, “Ugh, I’m bored. I’m going to go find some food. *eats everything in pantry*. MOM! We’re out of food!”
Or you could be like me (when I’m in a good mood) and snack on fruits and occasionally vegetables. But in my case, usually not vegetables. But, children, you should all eat your vegetables. They’re good for you, I promise. I know they don’t taste great, but you should eat them.
YES. Then it’s acceptable. But remember, like my mom always says, “Portions! Portions! Portions!” And so. Don’t eat so much that you . . . TURN ORANGE. I usually don’t have fruits in my house so I’m stuck with cheese, or vegetables. Which is okay because I mean, I like me a variety of stuff. Like corn. And spinach. And green beans. And turnips. And carrots. And of course, the best vegetable, broccoli. And cauliflower. And potatoes. I love potatoes. And . . . I like lettuce. There. A nice list. Of STUFF.
I like cucumbers. I’m okay with those. Especially with ranch. That’s good. Uhm . . . celery is good too. See how picky I am? I can’t think of anything else. Potatoes I guess. But yeah. You know those people who are just so insanely picky that you just want to slap them across the face? Or is that just me?
How could I forget celery and cucumbers?! I love those too. Yummy. But tomatoes, are disgusting. Don’t give me those. I’ll spit it out. Well, maybe a few people, but I don’t want to necessarily slap them. I always want to go up to them and look at them for a minute and say, “I’m sorry that you’re so boring that you’re taste buds only like the same thing.” But I’d probably never say that. I mean, that’s really mean! And it’s okay for people to have their opinions.
And that is the difference between Jo and I. Well, one of the differences at least.
That I call people boring and you just slap them?
I don’t actually slap them. I just consider it, and then do it in my head.
Well, that is what I meant. And I always have a habit of thinking, “Well if I said that, then imagine if someone said that to me. Yeah that wouldn’t feel good.”
And then there’s me who’s like, “Well if I did slap them, everyone would be looking at me. And we don’t want that, now do we Nydia?”
Yeah well, I grew up in the LDS church and with my mother. And my grandma. And my mom’s sisters. And they’re all like 1) “Love one another” and 2) “Treat people the way you want to be treated.”
Well, we teach that in my religion too. I just forget . . . sometimes . . .
I assumed so. But see, I had all those other women to tell me that because all of them do that and all of them . . . are like . . . that? Yeah.
That makes sense. My whole family is rather short tempered so ya know. I got stuck with that personality trait. Anyway. Health. That’s what we’re supposed to be talking about.
Oh yeah! So exercise, a word I can never spell. I like exercise. It makes me feel happy and accomplished and tired, which helps me sleep well at night.
And I don’t like exercise. Except for ballet. Obviously. I wouldn’t still be doing ballet if I didn’t like it.
Like I’ve said early, I’ve just started up again. And so uh . . . yeah. I like it fine. That’s why I can enjoy P. E. when I want to.
And also why I can’t enjoy gym. Unless it has anything at all to--no, that was a bad way to start that sentence. Unless what we’re doing could somehow benefit me in ballet, then I’ll enjoy it.
I like it when it benefits me any way! Like making me a better runner. Because I really like running. Long distance, of course. I’m much too slow to run for speed. Pfft, all of you should’ve watched my first track meet. *Shakes head* so shameful. Anyway. So yeah. I like running. And I like dancing. Really really fast dancing. So any latin dance. And some hip hop. That is, also, why I couldn’t do some aspects of ballet. I just need to be fast. ALL THE TIME. Except in running. Then I need to be . . . long . . .?
I can’t pace myself. So I can’t run long distance. But I can run short distance really quickly. And I didn’t go to any of the tract meets because of . . . probably ballet, but I can’t remember. And dance. I obviously like dance. I mean, no duh. Ballet can be fast. There are two kinds of combinations we do. Adagio and allegro, and if you play an instrument, you probably know what those mean. Slow and fast basically. But yeah. If ballet isn’t fast, it has a lot of things that make you tired eventually. Like my pas de deux for our upcoming performance. Anyway.
And I’m really glad you never did. Well, I wish you could’ve come for long jump. I can jump my own height, which makes me quite happy even though one girl jumped ten feet and was like, “UGH THAT WASN’T GOOD ENOUGH!” And yeah. Well obviously. That’s why I said some aspects. Because every dance at one point or another is fast. But the difference, hip hop and latin never slow down. You keep going, until you stop. Which in zumba, could mean you pass out. But don’t mind that. As long as you drink a lot of water . . . you should be fine!
I know. I was mainly saying that for our readers. Because there’s always that one idiot who says, “Oh I don’t like ballet. It’s too slow.” Another instance in which I want to slap them across the face.
Yeah please don’t slap me across the face because I never said I didn’t like it and if I didn’t, it wouldn’t be for that reason because that’s stupid. Oh yes. You're a ballet Missionary! That’s what I like to call you because you like to tell people the real hard truth about it so they don’t say stupid things about it and can change their mind for the better! Well, to me it’s for the better.
*bursts out laughing* A ballet missionary? *laughs* Well, I guess that’s true.
That’s what you are!
I need to write that somewhere. In a siggie or something. I’ll do that later. Later meaning later tonight because I know I won’t be able to sleep because it’s Sunday night.
Speaking of sleep, I need to some of that. Because I need to get up at five. So much fun! Seriously, I like being early. Because, “On time is just another way of saying late.” ~Jo
Or you could just cut out all the middle stuff and cut to the chase and say, “On time is late” as I say.
. . . oh okay
But if you want to pull a Jo *hint hint cough cough nudge nudge* you could say the whole thing.
I think everyone but Jo would be annoyed with me saying the whole thing, but, you know. Maybe I could just put it in my journal and hope that my daughter will like it or else . . . failure as a parent. Just kidding. But whatever. It’s just a sentence. A sentence. Yeah.
Your future daughter. I felt the need to say that because there are some odd people here on the interwebs.
Yes! YES THAT IS WHAT I MEANT. I do not have a daughter. At the moment. That’s crazy. I’m fourteen. And if I did, well then my parents would give it up for adoption. Most likely . . . and that’s just . . . no. No I wouldn’t do that. Anyway. I don’t have anything else to say. Do you?
Not really . . .
Okay bye!
Bye! *very obviously tries to take last word*
~Marie and Jo
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